Not-So-Love-Letter

Not-So-Love-Letter

I don't know whom I'm talking with, so here I am talking to my self.

I hope, one day he would read this. No matter where he will be in the future. That I've ever loved him, and cared about him. I really did. A lot. But I just can't accept the fact that you've changed. Did you notice that? I do understand that you're a busy bee, the fact that you didn't get excited anymore when you see me, that you wanna spend your little spare time with your friends instead of me. I really do understand, that you need spaces. I do. I've tried so damn hard to bring our butterflies back. You know, I could bring back mine, but yours are out of my control.

And something that you said to me, really open my eyes. Wide.
And I don't wanna hold you from the one you'll be loved. With all your heart.

So, if someone, in the future ask, "What happened? Why it didn't work out?" You could just answered it with a simple line, "What always happened, life."

Believe me. I've tried. I stucked. And I lost my self. And it doesn't suppose to go like this.

There's a phase that I'm sure of with you, that at that time, I wanna build my future with you. But you've changed. Among billions characters in the world I could tolerate, you've changed to be someone I really couldn't.

Every night, I pray, I cry, just to beg to God to bring the-old-version-of-you back to me, if you're my one. I just can't take another game, another drama. I just can't, dear Almighty God. I just wanna have a simple life, as simple as I love him and he loves me back. Loves me for who I am, my passion, my life, and my family. For their best and worst. Just like I'll do to his. Is that so bad?

And right now I haven't stop my praying, if you're asking. I still do have faith, of you, right now. Miracles do happen, I believe. And if they don't, they will. They will find you someone you love and loves you back, and me too. I will always love you, in a different way. But maybe, this is the last time I use one of my particular label for my articles. I dont know how God works.

Live well.

Sincerely yours,

Heart